Sunday, September 28, 2014

I'm BAAAACK!!

Yes indeed!  I'm back!  This time I feel like it's for good!  OMG!  I'm such a loser, fat, fucking fuck-up!  JK..LOL...Not really!   This is how I sometimes think of myself, but I truly do love myself and want the best for me and my family!  I have a fucking dis-order.  I actually have several fucking disorders that I'm unable to control with pure will power.  I've tried.  GOD seriously knows that I've tried so many different techniques and nothing has really worked for me!  I take that back.  The one tried and true, for me, are the 12 steps of AA, NA, OA and MA!  I'm a fucking addict to so many things, I've been working on trying to figure out just what it is that I'm trying to cover up or numb out to.  I haven't smoked any weed this year.  Although, I've come close to entertaining the idea, I just haven't made the time to partake in that adventure.  I know how the tape plays out.  I've just been dabbling in a little alcohol and lots of food!  Food that I know is bad for me.  It really pisses me off that I have all this knowledge about health and nutrition that I still abuse the junk food processed really bad stuff!  Anyhow...I'm over that.   I've been gluten free for 3 full days now.  I've been sober from alcohol since September 20, 2014.  I'm done!  I'm so done!  I'm 47 years old and I've hated the trajectory I've been on the last several years.  It's time for me to make a change to get me back on the path to a happy and joyous life.  I miss writing.  My goal is to start writing again to document my life in a not so public forum, such as Facebook.  I will try and write about my diet, sobriety, spirituality, aches and pains.  I was recently diagnosed as pre-diabetic, which really pisses me off!  Err...motivates me to get that under control.  Anyhow...enough out of me for now.

I did get to Bikram Yoga today.

I have an auto-immune flare up on my right side of my foot.  On a scale of 1-10, it's a  6-7 to touch.  It's been bothering me for 3 days now.  I just took 4 advil to hopefully reduce the pain so I can get out of bed in the morning and go to bootcamp!

Namaste

Saturday, September 13, 2014